Mitt Romney held three big-tickets fundraisers in New York's fancy Hamptons this weekend, providing some of his richest donors the chance to parody themselves in front of eager political reporters. The Los Angeles Times, The New York Times, and BuzzFeed all had reporters on hand and the quotes they brought back would read like something written in the imagination of Occupy Wall Street, if the wealthy people in question hadn't gladly put their names to the all-too-real statements.